Running Log #40

I am now in the last two weeks of training for my last race of the year. I can't believe it! The time has gone by so fast. I love having a race to look forward to.
This last week was a struggle to get out and run. The weather was perfect but my heart wasn't into it. I kept thinking tomorrow I will run, tonight I will run. But by the time it would come and I wouldn't want to. Running makes me feel strong, happy, and better about myself. Other exercise does that too but there is something about running that you walk away saying wow my body just did that and I didn't die. Biking and swimming aren't that hard for me. But when it comes to the running I just want to give up.
This is how I felt on Monday. My husband been had been gone all weekend. I felt couped up with the children, the weather didn't help either. After I picked up the children from swimming lessons, I told them that I was going to go run and that they needed to get ready for bed. I wanted to go 3 miles but as I started to run my calf started to hurt, the wind started to blow and for some reason there were a lot of teenagers walking the streets, which were making me nervous. I wish I could say that through all the adversity I kept going. But I didn't. I was hurting and scared. This run made me feel even worse than if I hadn't even gone in the first place. I didn't know when I would have the chance to run again.
As luck would have it, the opportunity came on Wednesday. Jersey was getting an award at school and I wanted to be there for her so I went to work later in the day. I was so excited. I couldn't handle it. I was going to get some ME time. I was going to get to run when the sun was shining and most scary teenagers were at school. Mike said to me run as far as you can in one hour. I did and it felt great. I went 5.76 miles in one hour. Probably the fastest I have ever gone. I loved that I could feel the sun. I know I said that already but there aren't to many of those days left. As I was running the pain in my calf was hurting but not as bad as on Monday. After 3 miles it felt better. I wanted to go longer than 5 miles but if I had I wouldn't have made Jersey thing in time.
I don't know why but when I run my head seems to clear. Thoughts come that I have been looking and waiting for, anxieties melt away and my favorite part is that I can feel love and peace from my Heavenly Father. I think that is why when I don't get to run I get a bit crazy. I need it now more than I ever thought I would. Which makes me nervous for the winter and for the 6 weeks of recovery time that I will soon be needing. I know that I will be fine and better than ever. Let's hope for a fast recovery.